The Story of Bumpie Pumpkin...

Ok, to make this story make sense, you have to understand that my son calls my sister "Bumpie," and not "Auntie."  This came from a mis-typed word in a text on an old T9 phone, where I was trying to type "Auntie" and I hit 286743 instead of 286843 and it changed Auntie to Bumpie.  My sister thought it was really funny, and told me, "I've decided that when you have kids they will call me Bumpie." A couple years later, along came Andrew, and thus began Bumpie.

Another thing to know is that my son forms attachments to things that you wouldn't think he might... Getting rid of clothes and toys is quite an ordeal because everything is "my favorite," or "it's so important to me Momma!"

On his pre-school field trip to the pumpkin patch, he got a small pumpkin, and he was instantly very attached to it.  Then at his friend's birthday party we also got some more pumpkins from their patch.  He got 2 medium sized pumpkins and 1 very small one. When he brought them home, he and his Dad decorated them. We didn't carve them, they just drew faces on them.  Andrew named them Mommy Pumpkin, Daddy Pumpkin, and Baby Pumpkin.  They lived on my dining room table for a week or so.

Halloween arrived, and I noticed that Mommy Pumpkin, and Daddy Pumpkin were starting to rot, and being as they lived on my table, I decided it was time for them to go. I took them out and dumped them in the yard waste bin, and didn't think anything of it.

Later on, Andrew noticed their absence and asked where they went.  I told him they had started to rot and I threw them away.  Apparently I should have phrased it in a kinder gentler manner.  My poor son started to cry.  It wasn't just a little crying either, it was full on crying with lots of tears, sobs, and asking "Who is going to take care of Baby Pumpkin now?"

I tried to calm him down and tell him that everything was just fine, and that Baby Pumpkin would survive just fine.  He was not buying that. I was not about to bring the rotting pumpkins back inside, so I knew that I had to come up with an idea, and fast because the tears were not stopping.

Suddenly an idea came to me, and I dashed off to my pantry and retrieved a butternut squash.  Luckily I had one on hand, and I know that squash can last for several months in the pantry.  I grabbed it and said, "Hey Buddy, look who I have! This is Baby Pumpkin's Auntie Squash, and she will take care of Baby Pumpkin now."

He was a little uncertain at first, but then he and his Dad drew a face on her, and I was really trying to talk up Auntie Squash.  I said, "She is Baby Pumpkin's Bumpie!" Andrew decided that she should be called "Bumpie Squash."  Dad and I agreed, happy to have the tears and the agony come to an end.  He decided that Baby Pumpkin, and Bumpie Squash should live up in his room where he could keep an eye on them and know that they were safe.  Later on that evening, he decided that since squash and pumpkins are related, Bumpie Pumpkin had a nicer ring to it.  

Bumpie Pumpkin

Baby and Bumpie Pumpkins

Andrew, finally happy now that we had a happy resolution to the situation.  You can see his eyes were still a little puffy, and there might even be tear tracks still.

So the Pumpkin Family settled into his room, and a few days later he started asking me what was going to happen to Bumpie Pumpkin.  Was I going to throw her away too?  Not it, her.  I explained that Bumpie Pumpkin could stay for awhile and take care of Baby Pumpkin, but eventually that would come to an end, and I was going to take Bumpie Pumpkin and use it for the intended purpose before it was too late.  He asked me what that meant, and being as I strive to be as honest as possible with my son, I told him that meant I was going to cook Bumpie Pumpkin some day.

Every day for the next week or so he would ask me, "Are you going to cook Bumpie Pumpkin today Momma?"  And I kept telling him no, not today.  After a few days, he said, "Ok Mom, you can cook her now." I told him that I didn't need a squash yet, so he could keep Bumpie Pumpkin a while longer.  Then after a few more days, he rescinded the offer and cooking Bumpie Pumpkin was off the table again. 

Well, flash forward to Wednesday night of this week, and we got a box from Blue Apron.  I opened it up and the meal we were making that night had a roasted butternut squash. I washed it and had it sitting next to the cutting board, and was getting ready to start cooking, and Andrew walks into the kitchen and says, "IS THAT BUMPIE PUMPKIN???? ARE YOU COOKING HER???" (Again "her" not it." I said, "No, it's not Bumpie Pumpkin, it's a different squash."  He demands, "WHERE IS SHE???"  I told him she was safe over on the buffet by the windows.  He ran off to check on her. 

I have a feeling that I am going to end up throwing away the Pumpkin Family some night while he is sleeping, and then telling him that they moved to a farm upstate somewhere.